TWO SIMPLE VALENTINE'S GIFTS FOR THE ONE YOU LOVE

TWO SIMPLE VALENTINE'S GIFTS FOR THE ONE YOU LOVE - This Wild Home

In my five years with my husband, I have learned that the most underrated gift is sharing how you feel. Telling the person you love why you love them and how much they mean to you can become a last priority. Whether you’re in the very beginning or you’ve been together for decades, it can seem like simply being with the person you love is enough to show them how you feel.

When it comes to gift giving, simply saying how you feel can seem cheap or too small, but I’ve figured out that sometimes it means more than you could ever know. Everyone wants to be loved and when they are loved, there are still going to be moments where it may not be as obvious. Moments where life happens or you simply forget to remind them of all the reasons why you love them.

So if you’re not sure what to get someone or you just want to get something really special, don’t forget that the most important thing you can give is love and acceptance to the one you care for most. Reassurance that, even in the ups and downs, you care for them and reminding them that you see all the little things that make them the wonderful person they are.

SIMPLE VALENTINE’S GIFTS

A JAR OF ALL THE LITTLE THINGS

The little things may seem so unimportant. Maybe you feel like you say it too much or that it’s just too obvious or cliche that it’s not even worth saying. Let me tell you, the little things are still nice to hear.

Each person is made up of all kind of little things. Maybe they have a specific smell that you can’t get enough of. Maybe there are details in their face that are unlike any others. When you sit down and really think about all the things that make a person unique and loved by you, you’ll find that the little things may not be so cliche. Yes, you may find your loved one beautiful, but this is all about the things that make them beautiful inside and out.

I think this is a gift that keeps on giving. Anytime your person feels down or needs a little extra love they can turn to this jar for some words of affirmation. It’s a simple way to make them feel extra special anytime they need it.

HOW TO MAKE IT

  • All you need is paper and a jar. I used an old Prego spaghetti sauce jar and paper from around the house.

  • You can make a label for it if you want. Maybe include a nickname, a poem, something to set this jar apart from the rest. My label simply says, “Dingus, I love you. Dingus, I do. Here are somethings I love about you.” (cause that’s our dorky nickname)

  • Then sit and write down all the things you love about the person you are with. Big, small, one word, ten sentences. Whatever comes to mind.

  • Cut out each thing and fold it up.

  • You can add to it over the years or just let it be a capsule of how you felt in that moment (I put the year on my jar but I may add to it every once in a while).

LOVE LETTERS

But not just a plain old love letter. Maybe one or two of those, but I’m talking love letters for special circumstances. Something you can write for them to open in specific moments. Not letters for them to read all right away, but for the moments when they truly need a little extra love.

I know for me, when things get busy or times get tough, I’m not always the best at reminding my husband that he is loved. Again, it’s one of those things you assume they know and think they understand, but there are so many moments where our loved ones may need a little more affection than we, or even they, think.

So for these letters, I have a few ideas of times when our significant others may need a little extra support. Moments where we may not be emotionally capable of portraying how we really feel. Moments where they may be feeling down and just aren’t quite ready to talk about it yet. Any moment that could occur where some kind words from us written in a moment of pure admiration is just what they need.

IDEAS FOR LOVE LETTERS

I like to include a “one for now” letter so they have something to open immediately. Just a quick little, “Here’s your gift and some nice things about you.”

Ultimately, you know your person the best and you know yourself the best. You know the moments that can occur where you may become unavailable and the moments that come around where they need a little extra encouragement.

Keeping those things in mind, here are some ideas for letter you can write:

  • For when you’re sad

  • For when you’re mad

  • For when you need a boost

  • For when you’re feeling down

  • For when I’m not around

  • For when you need some love

  • For when you feel forgotten

  • For when things get busy

  • For when you’re feeling insecure

  • For when I’m being grumpy  

  • If things get bad

THE TRIANGLE FOLD

If you want to fold them all fancy, here’s how I did it:

  1. After you’ve written the letter, fold it in 3 “hot dog” style.

  2. Starting from one end, fold one corner to the opposite side, making a triangle shape.

  3. Keep folding, keeping edges taut, until you have a little left at the top.

  4. Fold those corners to the middle to make a point and fold that under the flap to close.

TWO SIMPLE VALENTINE'S GIFTS FOR THE ONE YOU LOVE - This Wild Home
TWO SIMPLE VALENTINE'S GIFTS FOR THE ONE YOU LOVE - This Wild Home
TWO SIMPLE VALENTINE'S GIFTS FOR THE ONE YOU LOVE - This Wild Home
TWO SIMPLE VALENTINE'S GIFTS FOR THE ONE YOU LOVE - This Wild Home

COZY DATE NIGHTS IN

COZY DATE NIGHTS IN - This Wild Home

My husband and I have always loved going outside, having some drinks, and sitting together. It’s the activity that made us fall in love. As friends and roommates, we’d head to the deck of our house and just sit and talk for hours. We learned about each other and eventually decided we wanted to sit outside and talk forever.

Fast forward almost 5 years later and it’s still an activity that brings us closer together. It reminds us of the old days and gets us excited for the future. It’s a moment where it’s just the two of us and nothing else really matters.

But it’s cold now. We work harder now. We have more responsibilities now. We’re more tired now. And did I mention it’s cold now?

For some reason, sitting inside gives a different feel to things. It’s where our life happens. It’s where our kid runs around. It’s where we work. It’s not as romantic as the darkness and seclusion of our 3rd story patio. Honestly, inside is where you watch TV at the end of the night and don’t engage much. But this has to change because, like I said, it’s really freaking cold now.

So last night we had our first date night in a long time since moving away from family (aka much appreciated baby sitters). We’ve been learning more and more how important a regular date night is so we have recently decided to make it a weekly priority. But it’s cold now so we have to find a new way to engage in a special moment together without braving the outdoors and spending our whole time talking about the fact that it’s cold now.

So I’ve done some brain storming and last night, we figure it out!

THE SECRET TO DATE NIGHTS AT HOME

The reason we feel inclined to leave normal life when trying to focus on each other is to have a setting that is different from our day to day. Something that won’t distract us. Not that we don’t wind up talking about work and kids, but we’re not stressing about them. That’s the key.

When it comes to date nights at home, going outside has always been our go-to because simply being outside at night has a different feel to it than day time. It’s almost like being in a different place all together.

So we changed the setting inside. We made inside a different home entirely.

I put all the toys away, straightened up the house very nicely, turned on the secondary lighting and did away with the overheads. We put the phones away and stayed turned towards each other, chatting away as the hours flew by.

If you’re going to do date night at home, you need to have a date night setting. Something that instantly puts you in a specific environment that’s romantic mood with no distractions.

Once you find your date night setting, here are some things you can do!

IDEAS FOR DATE NIGHTS IN

  • Get Fancy

    • Dress up. Make sure you’re still in comfy clothes, but fix your hair, maybe throw on some lipstick.

    • Grab a nice bottle of wine or a cocktail.

    • Light a candle or two or five or however many.

    • Set up a fire, or put on that crackling fire place Netflix has that can seem cheesy but it’s actually awesome.

    • Get some good background music going. Honestly, I’ve learned to appreciate smooth jazz recently and it’s not a bad way to get in a fancy mood.

  • WATCH A MOVIE

    • Put on your comfiest PJ’s and coziest socks.

    • Grab some snacks and candy and maybe pizza cause why not.

    • Get all the blankets you can find.

    • Throw something on, but keep the volume low so you can talk over it and stay engaged.

    • Movie ideas: Timer, Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind, anything with Molly Ringwald, Julia & Julia, 50 First Dates, I don’t know. I haven’t seen a ton of movies. Have any suggestions?

  • Have A Sleepover

    For most couples that need to make a point to have date night, you’re probably already living together, but this is a fun way to change things up. Recently, Ian and I had to sleep in the living room because there was this really annoying noise coming from our downstairs neighbors that we could hear so clearly from our bedroom. Being in the living room made us feel like we were at a sleepover and it was awesome. If done right, it can feel like a a home away from home in your home!

    • Make a fort! Cause why not?

    • Set up all the couch cushions on the ground to make a mattress of sorts.

    • Stay up too late, channel your inner preteen. Maybe some truth or dare, maybe some ghost stories, it’s up to you!

    • Definitely have some cinnamon rolls the next morning.

  • Play A Game

    • Any game! Play cards, a board game. There are tons of apps for board games that are pretty fun.

    • You could also try one of these date night boxes that have different at home activities to try!

So there are some ways to mix it up and indulge in date nights at home without really feeling like you’re at home.

ON KNOWING HE’S THE ONE

ON KNOWING HE'S THE ONE - This Wild Home

I think a lot about how I knew I wanted to marry my husband.  

I knew super quick. Basically, the first moment we discussed having feelings for each other and he kissed me on the forehead before he went to class. That was when I knew. 

But being an oldest child and in my 20’s with friends who haven’t found that person yet, I think a lot about what it was that made me realize he was the one. What knowledge of this experience can I relay to people who are wondering if they’ve found it? 

I know the things that make me stay when things get hard. I know that things aren’t always perfect and an imperfect relationship does not mean it’s not right. If anything, being comfortable enough to fight for what you need, that’s what makes a relationship perfect. Especially when they take it to heart and try harder next time. 

But the one. The one relationship that makes you decide you don’t want any other relationship ever again? I mean, how do you sum that up? 

So I’ll try. This early morning as I lay in bed with a sleeping the one right next to me, I’m going to attempt to put into words why I’ll have this sleeping the one right next to me forever. 

HOW DID I KNOW? 

To start, we were friends first, but I don’t think that’s a requirement because it wasn’t until the months leading up to us dating that we actually got to know each other.  

We didn’t do everything perfect at any moment. We moved too fast in some aspects and moved to slow in others. But the one thing that stood out from anyone else I’d been with was that he always tried. Whether he knew how or not, he always tried to make sure I was happy and cared for no matter what. To this day, Ian is not content unless my life is filled with everything I need. 

And you know what, he was the first person I ever wanted the same for. The first person who’s needs and feelings actually mattered to the point where I was willing to set my own aside sometimes. 

I don’t think people are necessarily mean or selfish inherently. But I think we tend to preserve ourselves more when we feel the person we’re with is not looking out for us. 

When we’re in a relationship where our feelings aren’t any kind of priority and our needs and passions go unfulfilled and unnoticed, even minimally, it’s hard to feel that desire to give anything in return.  If anything, that’ll make you want to fight for yourself harder until eventually everything falls apart.

I think to sum it up: I knew he was the one because I felt a strong desire to be good to him. To be better for him. 

I felt this, because I knew he would do the same for me. 

When the arguments we have get out of hand, this is what it always comes back to. No matter what happens, no matter what comes our way, we always have to find a way to care, even a little bit, about what the other is going through. Even if we feel wronged or forgotten, we have to care. Even if we just screamed at each other for an hour (or a day or a week) we have to care.  

As long as we always care, this will always work. But it doesn’t work unless we both are actively trying to fight for each other, not just ourselves. 

But I know he always will and he knows I always will because we came into this knowing it’s what we need to do. Even if we forget sometimes, even if we don’t always want to, we will always come back to that.

And that’s why he’s the one. 

ON KNOWING HE'S THE ONE - This Wild Home